monsoonmartin

Over the holiday weekend, Mrs. Monsoon and I took in the new film Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. It was marvelously entertaining, with real suspense, charm, and breathtaking visual treats. There are minor quibbles I have with the film—two great actors, Cate Blanchett and John Hurt, were utterly wasted in one-dimensional roles; the obnoxiously named Shia LaBeouf gave a bland performance; the film marked the unwelcome return of caricaturish Soviet stereotypes; the plot of every Indiana Jones film is based in paternalism, colonialism, and sometimes downright racism.

But honestly, all of this is beside the point in a very real sense: we go to see an Indiana Jones film to lose ourselves in the adventure, the wit, and (for those of us who remember going to see the original installment in the series multiple times when we were in elementary school) the nostalgia of the experience. We don’t go to interrogate its perspective and pick apart its shortcomings. It’s a thrill ride that, despite its flaws, is not to be missed.

Enough about the film, though—what I really want to tell you about is the venue where we saw it. Rather than heading to one of the three theaters in the Reading area showing Crystal Skull, we ventured south to my new favorite movie theater, Penn Cinema in Lititz. (It’s in Neffsville, technically, I believe, but whatev.)

Penn Cinema is a ten-screen theater that opened in December 2006 after a feverish six months of construction, plopped in what seems to be the middle of a field on Airport Road. (Construction is underway to add four screens by July of this year.)

Catching a flick at Penn Cinema is a delightfully gratifying experience. (First of all, there is a dramatically lower danger of either Mrs. Monsoon or me running into one of our students either working there or attending a film, as can be a hazard at the Berks theaters; the teenagers there are from Warwick and Ephrata school districts, primarily.)

The theater is generally not that crowded, at least during the matinee hours when I tend to visit the theater. It has a large parking lot, clean facilities—there are trash receptacles on the way out of each screening room, stylishly concealed—and lovely, spacious restrooms whose fixtures are all automated to ensure minimal contact with the germs emitted by your fellow theater-goers. The food is just fine, with about-average prices, and local favorites are included in the offerings, lending the establishment a real sense of place.  (Speaking of which, there's a charming touch in the theater's lobby: three clocks situated adjacent to one another all display local times in the manner of newsroom clocks with times in New York, London, Moscow, etc.)

The screening rooms themselves are top-notch, and some films are digitally projected. All theaters have stadium seating with extremely comfortable, high-backed seats and movable armrests; the use of curved screens ensures that every seat in the house will enjoy a pleasing view.

Ticket prices are very reasonable when compared with movie houses in the Berks region: evening shows are $9.00 and matinees are $6.50; Cinema Center Fairgrounds Square is $9.25 and $6.25, and Carmike Wyomissing is $9.50 and $6.75.

The real draw to Penn Cinema for me is the fact that many of the annoyances of modern filmgoing are (quite deliberately, it would seem) absented from the experience.

First, I don’t know if we’ve just gotten lucky the few times we have been to Penn Cinema, but distractions like cell phone usage, kicking chairs, crinkling bags, general tomfoolery, and the always-popular inane conversations—“What did he say?”; “Now who is that guy?”; “Hey! Isn’t that the girl who was in that other movie? No, not her, the other one…”—are gloriously absent (or at least minimally present) here.

And the moviegoer is not forced to sit through thunderous commercials for Coca-Cola, the US military, or the like, played at deafening volumes, which go on (pun intended) ad infinitum at other theaters. Allow me to share the strongly-worded pissy-pants letter I sent last year to Carmike Cinemas regarding this very issue, along with a portion of the response I received from a Carmike district manager soon thereafter.

My snotty letter:

On Saturday, December 8th, my wife and I went to the Carmike Cinema in Wyomissing, PA to see the film American Gangster (the 7:10 showing). Once the theater went semi-dark, indicating previews were about to begin, we sat through no fewer than eight commercials for various products, including a full-length music video by the band 3 Doors Down played at incredibly high volume touting the merits of the National Guard.

When the first preview appeared on the screen, we felt that showtime was finally imminent. However, we then sat through six full preview trailers for upcoming movies, all of which were once again played at ear-splitting volume. I realize that trailers are a part of the moviegoing experience, and the newspaper ads for movie theaters include the caveat “all shows include pre-feature content.”

But for this particular movie, we sat through fully 26 minutes of pre-feature content before the film began. I feel this is excessive and a horrible example of taking advantage of one's customers. Given the high ticket and concession prices, I feel it's reasonable for moviegoers to expect that they won't be forced to endure a 26-minute bombardment of noise and ads before the movie they've come to see. I hope you will take seriously into account my observations.

And a portion of the corporate jibba-jabba response I received:

As far as the pre-feature content goes, this program has been in place for the past ten years and longer. We have placed five to seven minutes of commercial advertising at the beginning of our feature to offset the increasing costs associated with doing business. In this way, we do not have to pass these costs on to our customers in the form of higher prices. In fact, theaters that do not show these ads are currently charging up to $18.00/ticket.

We follow these ads with about fifteen to twenty minutes of coming attractions, something that has been done for well over fifty years. The film distributors request these be played, if we do not comply, then it becomes very difficult at negotiation time to obtain their films. This content is generally about twenty to twenty-five minutes long. Please note that these types of ads are becoming more prevalent in all areas of entertainment.

I highlighted one sentence of the district manager’s response in boldface because it is a lie, a damn lie, and a statistic (apologies to Benjamin Disraeli), and my experience at Penn Cinema proves it.

At Penn Cinema, one enters the theater to see a scrolling series of local goods and services being advertised onscreen. The theater lights dim and two or three previews are shown—after which the room descends into a more complete darkness and the film begins. And yet far from necessitating a doubling of ticket costs, Penn’s prices are actually lower than those at Carmike Wyomissing. What now, sucka?!

The owner of my new favorite theater, Penn Ketchum, seems to go out of his way to establish an authentic relationship with his customers and with the community—unlike corporate behemoths whose ties to the community are chiefly within the consumer/business paradigm.

Penn sends out a free weekly newsletter loaded with trivia, facility updates, a few tidbits about his own life, upcoming events, movie showtimes and synopses.

The most distinctive aspect of Penn Cinema’s relationship with the community is its “The Heart of Lancaster Presents…” program. Each Monday at 7pm throughout the spring and fall, Penn Cinema screens a classic film based on customer requests, Penn’s ideas, and availability of prints. Aside from connecting with another business in the Lititz region (Heart of Lancaster is a medical center in the area), the program allows for direct interaction with customers and enables people to see some of their favorite films on the big screen again. Previous classic films screened through “The Heart of Lancaster Presents…” have included Raiders of the Lost Ark (attended by Mr. and Mrs. Monsoon), Casablanca (attended by Mrs. Monsoon and her ma), The Princess Bride, Top Gun, Star Trek: The Motion Picture, Raging Bull, The Goonies, Footloose, Citizen Kane, Caddyshack, Witness, and many others.

At a HOL screening, Penn greets the audience and welcomes them to the show, full of enthusiasm for the film. He shares tidbits about the making of the film, some historical perspective when applicable, takes questions from the audience, and gives prizes to audience members who can correctly answer his trivia questions about the movie. The HOL screenings are generally crowded and are marked by a festive atmosphere; people from all over the region are brought together by a genuine love of cinema.

The spring season of HOL has just ended (with a showing of 1989’s Batman at the end of April) but Penn is already hard at work planning the fall 2008 (September through December), spring 2009 (February through April) and subsequent seasons. He is constantly soliciting suggestions, so I’d like to offer forth this list of twenty very different movies off the top of my head that I would enjoy seeing on the “big screen” once again (or, in some cases, for the first time).

The Shawshank Redemption

The Rock

Fletch

All the President’s Men

Drop Dead Gorgeous

Poltergeist

Hoosiers

Action Jackson

The Breakfast Club

Die Hard

WarGames

Legend of Billie Jean / Turk 182! double feature

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles

Romancing the Stone

Three Amigos!

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

The Shining

Dog Day Afternoon

Malcolm X

Please leave comments below ranking these ideas and/or offering suggestions of your own!  (I think he’s looking to show films that were in original theatrical release at least ten years ago.)  I will keep you posted when the next season’s offerings are announced…

Penn Cinema is only about 40 minutes from Laureldale, a half-hour from Shillington, and 25 minutes or so from A-town.

Simple directions: Take Route 222 south past the Adamstown, Denver, and Ephrata exits to the Brownstown/Rothsville exit (Route 772). Right at the end of the ramp, then an immediate left onto Route 272.

Go a bit less than 2 miles, then make a slight right onto Route 722. (There may be a slight detour here due to some road/bridge construction on 722; just follow the signs.)

After about two and half miles, make a right onto Airport Road (where you see a sign for the airport) and continue less than a half-mile; Penn Cinema is on your left.

See you at the movies!

Monsoon